Sharing excerpts from my personal journals
“Draw me in” my Lord said to me. As he showed me my hand extended, my fingers just touching him and my eyes turned away. I keep him there, right at my fingertips; I know he is with me. I know what he can be. Have I been so distracted? If I can touch him, I feel safe. What will happen if I do as he asks; if I involve him, drawing him close beside me, if I consult with him in my every day? Greater things than I can imagine!
Whatever is pure…
The first thing that comes to my mind is God’s love. It is pure and true. His intentions towards me and in loving me are pure. There is no hidden agenda, there is no doubt, no wavering. I want to say my love for God is pure, though, true it is strong and intense, yet, I am imperfect in it.
The second thing that comes to my mind is music. Although there are various things that affect it’s purity — the words of a song play in my mind —
“I surrender to you, Lord, I’m yielding all I am to you.
You have captivated me,
And I come to give my devotion.”
(Devotion by Kathryn Scott)
The purity of true worship. The purity of the harmonious blend of notes. The purity of the sound of the flute. These things to me reflect on true place of purity on earth.
Worship tugs at my heart and draws me in, and I can sense God’s presence and feel safe and loved.
November 19, 2009
I saw the ground hardened from the winter snow and cold. Then came a three pronged hoe tilling up the ground, “breaking” it up to prepare it to receive the life-producing seed.
We must be broken in order to produce beauty.
New Living Translation (NLT)
12 I said, ‘Plant the good seeds of righteousness,
and you will harvest a crop of love.
Plow up the hard ground of your hearts,
for now is the time to seek the Lord,
that he may come
and shower righteousness upon you.’
(Don’t know the date on this one. But I was on a retreat.)
Lord, how precious are your ways to me. You reveal that which is hidden and confirm that which is untried.
Whenever I turn to you I find comfort and strength and I wonder at my striving alone. You are my prize, a most valuable ally. Apart from you there is confusion and despair. A cup I no longer wish to partake. Your glory is beyond my uttering and your worth beyond all I have to offer. My words are like pebbles thrown upon a mountain, they add nothing to your greatness. Lord, what I can give is taken away and what I can add has no value. Alone your glory stands.
I am thankful you have chosen to love me and have poured out your Spirit that your glory may be seen in me. How awesome is your name.
Be rooted and grounded in my love. Be safe within the covering of my arms. Grow from the depth of my word and the fountain of my Spirit. Perfect love casts out fear. My love is perfect toward you. Allow my love it’s work in you. There is no depth where my love cannot reach you, nor wound which I cannot heal. The sin which so easily clings to you, I can more easily cleanse.
Let my desire for you find rest in your soul.
(February 5, 2002)