Fatigued, Frustrated, and Failing

Sometimes being open about your life means sharing the mess. My goal is to encourage others, but today I will remember that it’s okay to need encouragement.

Matthew 5:45 – “…For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike.” (NLT)

I think about this verse when I struggle to come to terms with being human, and the reality of living on planet Earth. Life is not a contest to see who can become perfect, it is an opportunity to love and be loved by our Creator.

I don’t know where to start – for truly I have some good  mixed in with these struggles, but the struggles seem to be throwing a wet blanket on my life at the moment. I haven’t been able to sit down and write or even read scripture to get me through.

Since my accident, I’ve noticed I feel exhausted and I keep getting headaches. I had to make a trip in to the doctor to renew my prescription for my anti-depressant, and check my thyroid levels. The results came back with my thyroid levels being too high (I’ve had half my thyroid removed). In the nearly 10 years since my surgery I haven’t had to change my dosage so I went online to find out what the symptoms were.

What are the Signs of Over-medication?

They vary, depending on the person, but signs of over-medication with thyroid hormone replacement are often similar to the symptoms of hyperthyroidism, and can include anxiety, difficulty sleeping, elevated pulse, weight loss (or in some cases, weight gain), diarrhea, muscle aches and weakness, hair loss, fatigue, exhaustion, irritations or sensitivity in eyes or neck area, among others (from about.com).

So I have a lower dose prescription now and I’m hoping this fatigue will dissipate. Plus the various other symptoms that aren’t quite as noticeable but still causing problems.

In the mean time, I feel like I’m failing and am quite frustrated about the information I am learning. with knowing what is appropriate to incorporate with my blog. There are so many programs to use, or apps to download, it’s all so overwhelming. You may see me try out some things or I may just stay the course. I’m not trying to be famous or make money, but I would like to reach more people. I don’t know of anyone who can’t benefit from knowing and experiencing God’s grace.

So the good?

  • The accident may have totaled my perfectly good car, but I absolutely love my new car.
  • My Paleolithic style diet may have caused me to become exhausted by my system being able to absorb the thyroid hormones more efficiently, but I’m down almost 20 lbs and 2 pants sizes.
  • I may not be doing everything I want to be doing, but I am well-loved and well-cared for.

If you are in a hard place, share your story in my comments. You may find yourself being encouraged, or being an encouragement to someone else. Sharing opens the dark secret place to the Father of Heavenly Light. May He so bless you!

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2 thoughts on “Fatigued, Frustrated, and Failing

  1. May the Father of Heavenly Lights provide you peace, comfort, rest, and restoration in the midst of your trials. I agree with you completely that being transparent in the midst of tough times serves to be an encouragement to others … thanks for being an encouragement … Bernie

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