I’ve been watching this docu-series online about broken brains over the past week and it has been both insightful and a bit worrisome. It has been challenging my habits and routines, causing me to evaluate how important my health is to me. Am I willing to make some hard changes and break some chains? Or do I hide my head in the sand and continue in to ignore the consequences of my actions?

At church on Sunday, we were singing “How He Loves” (by David Crowder), and I stopped singing and wrote this down in my journal: “‘I don’t have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way that He loves us.’ I realize how true it is, that all this negative thinking and brow beating take such time and energy in maintaining. But if I shift my thinking to meditate on the way God loves me, I would have no time to revisit all my failings.”

Then on Monday I made the effort to at least look for one scripture to read and I actually started with Psalm 2:11 because that is my birthday, but it didn’t jump out at me so I read Psalm 1:1-3. That was the one! Verse 1 begins: “Blessed is the man who…” and continues to describe what not to do; then verse 2, what to do; and finally in verse 3, what will my life be like should I comply: “He is like a tree planted by streams of water…”

This scripture struck me about my life and how important it is to choose to spend time meditating on who God is and connecting with him. To plant myself by the stream that is his presence. He is my source of life, and only when I draw from him will I begin to find my life becoming fruitful.

As I meditate on his “law” he becomes ever more clear and his ways become known to me. I don’t interpret this as studying or memorizing in the sense that I must know the rules so I don’t break them, but in the sense of getting to know the one who is behind them. How God shows his love for me and his desires for me; pouring himself out into the words written through the ages by those touched by the Holy Spirit for our benefit.

I am grateful to all the contributors, and all the information being given in the docu-series, and I intend to make some big changes because of it. More so I am grateful for God’s presence in my life, because without him, I would have no hope that I will see these changes come to fruition. Thanks to all that share this life with me! I always hope that by being open about my life that someone will be encouraged and know that they are not alone. God bless!